As women, we’ve been taught that we need to be strong, independent and guarded in order to survive, and although those characteristics have their place and can be positive depending on what context you look at it, they can also work against us by constricting the flow of our natural feminine energy causing us to become hard and to rest in our masculine energy, doing it all ourselves and fighting to survive. These roles and stereotypes have been put on us by society and it up to us to become who we already are and change the narrative (subtle sex ed reference lol).

There’s a deficit of Feminine energy in the world. Women are much more masculine now and femininity is portrayed as weak. The ultimate desire of the masculine is to have more freedom while the ultimate desire of the feminine is to have more love. The deficit in feminine energy means there’s an overall deficit of love, and if there’s not a lot of love, there’s a lot of fear. We see that in the world today.

It’s important to cultivate our feminine energy so we can have more love going around. Love changes your life and not just yours but the lives of everyone around you. This is not about diminishing the masculine, but in order to usher in and bring forth the new world where we can live in a society that fosters partnership and collaboration between the two, where both masculine and feminine energy will be respected and acknowledged without one being pitted against the other, and people can have both freedom and love, it’s important we cultivate our feminine energy. Remember:

You deserve the world.
You are the pulse of culture.
Your are unstoppable.

Don’t let the world knock you down and around because you can’t see or remember who you are. What are you doing to improve yourself and uplift the women around you? What are you doing to be the light? What are you teaching the young women in your life? It’s up to you to take responsibility and take this time out to build yourself, your life and your dreams.

Femininity needs to start being taught at a young age and a lot of traditions and cultures don’t encourage that. We need to learn how to embrace our vulnerability and know that it is okay to ask for help and to care for others & ourselves as well as learning how to groom ourselves to accentuate our best features and of course being confident and comfortable in our own skin. I see mother’s being afraid to teach their daughters how to be feminine and that could stem from a multitude of reasons (maybe she isn’t feminine herself, or she doesn’t know how to be, or she’s scared of the attention it will bring) I won’t even get into and that’s understandable but still, whatever the reason, it needs to stop, it serves no one.

Gender dynamics are an integral part of our existence and it’s important we understand them. We’re doing future generations of women a disservice by not passing on what we know and have learnt, doing more harm than good if you ask me. We need to start deconstructing a lot of our cultural and traditional practices that have become a way of life that don’t even serve us, and taking an active part in cultivating new habits, traditions and practices that will get us back in touch with our full divine feminine power.

This series was created for my ladies who want to embrace their Feminine side in order to make improvements and level up the quality of their life experience. It will be a brief introduction to femininity and I hope a resource for women who want to embrace their Divine Femininity. The things I’m going to be sharing with you today are part of a lifestyle that must continuously be worked at till it becomes second nature.

What is Femininity?

The dictionary describes Femininity as the qualities or attributes, behaviours and roles associated with women and regarded as characteristic of women, which comprises of demeanor and appearance, acting and being in a way that is typical of or suitable for a woman, girlish or womanly, gentle, emotional, supportive, empathetic, intuitive, patient, sensual, confident, the list is endless.

But for me, I like to describe femininity as the power of creation in control. Let that sit for a moment and digest that in every fiber of your being.

Most women are taught to embrace their femininity by their mothers and other dominant female figures in their life. Some believe you’re either born with it or you aren’t but that’s not necessarily true. I personally think anything can be cultivated with time and practice.

Femininity is more than just wearing pink or acting girly. It encompasses everything from your demeanor, to your confidence. The way you speak, walk and how you act. We’ve gotten so busy trying to prove that we can do what men can do that we’ve forgotten who we are and what we can do, and in the process we’ve lost our uniqueness and our brilliance and individuality. Truth is, we weren’t created to do everything a man can do, we were created to do everything they cannot, thereby being the perfect complement & together forming the perfect unit, and many can’t accept that simple truth.

Why would you want to be Feminine?

Not everyone wants this and that’s fine. But for those considering it, two reasons:

1. The world is a harsh place.
Thinking about the qualities a Divine Feminine Embodied displays (gentle, emotional, supportive, empathetic, intuitive, patient, sensual, confident…) and insert all of that into a world filled with anger, pain and hatred. Think of the change that will create, the ripple effect, basically lighting a candle in a dark room, putting it up on a stand and watching it chase all the darkness into corners as more candles get lit cuz of that one candle who decided to light it up!

2. Shifting energies.
Whether we like to agree or not, the world is changing. Old systems and values are being uprooted and with that new systems are able to take root, but we have to choose to be intentional about it.

How can you embody your Divine Feminine?

Work on the Interior as well as Exterior, As Within, So Without.
Practice Love.
Be More Receptive & Sensual.
Dress The Part.
Nourish Yourself Mind, Body & Spirit.
Prioritize Selfcare & Wellness.
Emphasize Your Beauty & Brilliance.
Cultivate a Powerful Aura.
Embrace Self Confidence
Strive for Excellence in all that you do.
Celebrate Your Femininity.
Guide Yourself Back to it.

We have the notion that Femininity should look a certain way but when it boils down to it, it’s up to you how you choose to portray your femininity. The most important thing is staying true to yourself and showing up as your best, soft, feminine and educated. Learn to stand your ground without losing elegance or grace.

Being feminine is not just about clothing and shoes (although that’s a huge bonus which I personally love to explore any chance I get), it’s about how you love and show love to the world. Your quiet strength and how you express your creativity, charm, gentleness & graciousness. Rising above hate and criticism. Prioritizing your education (and I don’t even mean degrees), health, style and most importantly your character & personality. Be passionate and authoritative, firmly grounded in the knowing of who you are and avoid self doubt and negativity. Here are a couple of my personal faves to get you started!

Shadow Work

This I would recommend to anyone, not just those trying to embody their Divine Feminine. I believe that it’s important to look into the depths of our being, SEE, UNDERSTAND, KNOW and most importantly HEAL all the parts of ourselves that have been bruised, battered, shamed and hidden for far too long and find ways to integrate those parts into ourselves for union, harmony and alignment.

Diligent Selfcare

It’s important to take a holistic approach with this and incorporate selfcare of the Mind, Body & Spirit into our daily practice. Develop and cultivate selfcare rituals that sustain and support your being.

Curate Your Style

A feminine woman should be classy, poised, polished, sophisticated and elegant with her style. Feminine women who receive the most attention & respect often have the most naturally stylish and well put together looks. Everyone has their style and one size does not fit all but we can always be more feminine with our style. Find ways to incorporate soft colors, florals, dresses, skirts and heels & eye catching pieces into your wardrobe. Pay attention to materials and fabrics, choose clothes that accentuate your figure and complexion, wear the right underwear, wear jewellery and accessorize to your heart’s content!

Beauty Rituals

Give extra care to your hair, skin, nails, teeth & feet, the littlest things make the biggest difference, and we may think that these things don’t matter or will go by unnoticed but believe me people notice. Go for soft looks that are easily maintained and watch how you quietly attract all it is that you are.

Health & Fitness

You need to exercise and keep moving and do this consistently (which is the difficult part), get that heart pumping, send oxygen to you brain, eat fresh, raw, organic and whole, stay hydrated, it makes your life better overall. Don’t forget your body is a temple of the Divine. You are what you put into yourself, it’s important that you take in only the best, cuz you deserve it! And this applies to everything you consume.

Character & Personality

In everything you do, always choose peace, always be kind, always be patient & always be loving and honestly you’ll be fine.

The world we know hasn’t really been working and we need to make some changes that are long overdue. You can choose to rise above all the madness around you and know that it’s up to you how you choose to be portrayed and conceived by those around you. I hope you’ll choose to be a part of this change, and bring back the fullness of your Divine Feminine Energy, bring back love, and I hope you find your own way to contribute to healing the collective! Until next time…

Yours truly, Chalya.



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