Manners refer to the way things are done, or a persons outward bearing towards other. While charm refers to the power or quality of delighting, attracting or fascinating others to control or achieve, by or as if by magic. In other words, manners for charm refer to a way someone does things outwardly that delight, attract or fascinate others effortlessly. From that definition you can see why we would want to cultivate this skill. I’m a Nigerian who grew up in Nigeria, and from my experience generally people are just straight up mannerless for no apparent reason when it wouldn’t even take anything to just not be. I don’t get it and I doubt I ever will. I think everyone is over the whole being a bitch thing. So first things first as with anything in life, you have to build a solid foundation. Let’s start with the basics!
Please. Thank you. Excuse me.
Make Eye Contact for a deeper connection.
Remember Important Details People Share.
Always be punctual. It shows you’re respectful of yourself and others.
As a guest make sure you bring a gift.
Let people know things ahead of time.
When you’re on your cell phone in public spaces, be mindful of others.
Put your phone away in a social setting. Be present and engage in the moment.
Don’t chew with your mouth open, or talk with food in your mouth.
Complaining doesn’t solve problems, reign in your irritation.
Never argue. Simply State your feelings and articulate your standards.
And finally, always be mindful, kind, soft, loving with a teensy dash of fiesty in all your interactions and your base is ready to build up on! Until next time.
Yours truly, Chalya.