Focusing On Yourself

So I think that this year a lot of us have come to realize that prioritizing ourselves is a need that we can no longer ignore cuz you know what? It all starts and ends with you. Think about it a bit, without you your reality ceases to exist and everything in it vanishes. Anyway, we’ve decided (I have, you should too) that we’re leaving behind whatever does not serve us along with all the negative energy it comes with. We’re letting it all go… breath in… deep breath… breathe out… See, don’t you feel better already? Cool.

We don’t want to be spending our time on things that don’t make us happy or live lives that are not authentic to ourselves. It’s so stupid how we sit in prisons of our own construction and we’re sitting living a trapped life when we hold the key to our freedom. So stupid. Wake. Up.

Due to this glaringly pointed fact, we’re only planting seeds of what is worthy of our attention and energy. Moving forward, your health, well-being and happiness should be your top priority.

One major key to focusing on yourself is to stop worrying about what other people are thinking and doing, we have zero control over that and if we realize how little others think about us we’d think way less about them. We’re all just bobbing around in our idyllic narcissistic bubbles. What we can control however, is our own nature, attitude and character. It’s not selfish, it’s necessary.

As ironic as it’s going to sound, because we’re so out of touch with taking care of ourselves it may seem like a gi-normous gargantuan task and you may be wondering where to I even begin. Well well, today is your day cuz I’ve got you with a couple of pointers to guide you on starting to focus on yourself.


Figure out what you want out of life. We think we know what we want, but let’s get those sticks out of our asses for one second and actually think about our lives and our needs and our desires. Now project where you are right now, best case scenario, current path you’re on, is that going to land you at where you want to be? Most of us have too many external voices telling us who to be, what to want and how to live our lives, and in light of all that ongoing action, our own voice and the vision we have for ourselves tends to fade out into an almost non-existent lull in the background. This drowning out of our own voice is usually because we’re reliant on external sources for energy and have not begin to tap into the source within, which in my opinion is the only actual way to become a self actualized individual. Listen to your inner voice. Listen to your intuition. Spend time alone and connect with your soul, the essence of who you are, just allow yourself to be, release the confines that you’ve created for yourself as a shield and pay attention to what resonates with you. More importantly what doesn’t, it’s in that you learn and grow. Do not be defined by your external environment. To thine self always be true.


Stop looking around, the answers lie within, plus no one like a copycat. Originality is spicy. We may not realize it but a manifestation of this and a great example is spending all your time talking about other people, we all do this at one point or another over the course of our lives, but I think we need to stop. Your opinion is irrelevant unless it has been requested. That’s all there is to it. When we’re constantly talking about other people we have no space in our energy or even our minds to accommodate ourselves or our goals. You can talk about people but only if it’s in a positive light and only if it serves a purpose of learning and growth. But still, don’t spend all your time doing this.


Take social media breaks and unfollow anyone who doesn’t inspire or bring value and positivity to your life. Social media has taken over the whole world and it’s amazing, I love it. But in life as it usually goes, humans tend to swing towards the side of pleasure and what makes them feel good, and that’s not a bad thing, I’d be the first to advocate living by pleasure, but, pleasure has many faces and some are disguises. We need to learn and deal with the fact that sometimes, what feels good isn’t going to advance you and make you grow. It’s rough but it’s worth it. Stop stalking people, stop creating fake accounts to check up on your exes or anyone else, it’s unhealthy and it does you no good. Plus you’re only giving into habits that don’t serve you. It’s important that we are consciously aware of the habits we give in to on a daily basis. The things we do consistently either replenish or deplete our energy source. Ask yourself, are my habits giving me life? Do I feel happy and alive? Do I see myself in Technicolor?! Lol.


Be conscious of what you are feeding your mind. This is really important and we don’t give it half as much attention as we should. It goes for everything that we consume and come in contact with, music, literature, TV, shows, movies, people etc. You become what you spend time on or with, it’s nature you can’t help it. Spending time focusing on low vibration energy sources will only serve to bring your vibration down to it’s level or worse, lower. On the mainstream scale is say the world isn’t doing too great on this, we’re focused on all the wrong things, things that do not enhance the quality of life or inner peace and well-being. Be real with yourself and stop focusing on things that make you feel worse.


Have words that you live by. It could be a word, a phrase, a quote, whatever. It’s going to serve as a sort of mission statement nor tagline that your going to choose to live your week, month, year, life by. When we don’t have an objective, we have nothing to help us create focus and a lack of focus begets a lack of direction. Ask yourself, what do I really want to do with my life? It sometimes helps to think if money wasn’t a factor in existence what would you be doing. Take that and use it to create your motto. It serves as a guide you can refer to anytime we find ourselves going off track. It helps with grounding.


Face yourself and love yourself. Another thing we fail to realize is that there’s one thing you’re stuck with as long as you exist, and that’s yourself, you’re stuck with you. Of course suicide is an option but we all know how that goes considering your soul is eternal. But hey feel free to take a swing at it. There’s a line in a Lana song that goes “… I moved to California
But it’s just a state of mind
Turns out everywhere you go
You take yourself, that’s not a lie…” Think about how inescapably miserable you’d be lugging around someone you hated or disliked. It would be an excruciating experience and no way to live life. If you don’t like yourself you need to deal with that ASAP. Devise a plan to start fresh in loving yourself. Make a decision to commit to you. Show up for you so you can be the best you. You are the only one who can change your life and give yourself what you deserve. Never forget that.

Take your power back by loving and being your most authentic self.

Yours truly, Chalya.


4 thoughts on “Focusing On Yourself”

  1. #3 was a big one for me. It revolves around my sister and her negativity. I finally just deleted all of her messages. I stopped following her on social media. The relationship was just so toxic, it was so painful. I feel much better after making that decision.


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