So a couple of years back I stumbled on the corner of the internet where the femininity movement was taking place and from the very moment I found myself there, I was in love cuz you know what? Each and every one of those women (and few men too) preaching that we need to tap, heal and activate our feminine energy, are right. This is who we are people, and how do we go through life without ourselves and expect to have the highest and most satisfying experience? Let me answer that for you, it’s an expectation that is ridiculous and unfounded. Throw it away.
I think at this point in our evolution, it’s safe to say that we know that having confidence is an essential part that needs to be developed if we want to take charge of our experience right? Right. No need to get into that. From MY experience the type of confidence that most people possess leans towards the masculine side of the spectrum, and frankly, if you’re female that just won’t serve you. I don’t have to point out reasons why, they’re obvious. But if it’s not, all I’ll say is it’s a little too stiff and edgy, spikey if you may, for my liking.
Getting into it, what exactly is confidence and how am I supposed to develop mine? First off, I think it’s important to understand the type of confidence I’m referring to so I’m going to go ahead and insert the definition according to dictionary.com and highlight below which I’m referring to.
Confidence (n.)Full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing:
[kon – fi – duhns]
“We have every confidence in their ability to succeed.”
Belief in oneself and one’s powers or abilities; self-confidence; self-reliance; assurance:
“His lack of confidence defeated him.”
Jumping straight into, Feminine Confidence is the only way that we as women can break the cycle and stand in your zone of greatness. So far we’ve not been doing a great job making the most of our assets and power as women, largely due to the fact that it was never modeled for us, regardless, laying blame still isn’t the solution. We need to stop pointing fingers outward, poking and prodding others, instead let’s use that energy and focus it on ourselves. Let’s go inside and dissect the workings of our being and get to know that intricacies that make is who we are. It’s time, whether we realize it or not, cuz I think it’s safe to say that at this point in evolution, we’re literally at the end of our rope and you have only two options: step out of the noose, or get hanged. When you take a step back and realize that wars were fought cuz of women, empires rose and fell at our whim, you would pay closer attention to this.
So what is this Feminine Confidence that I’ve been going on and on about you might ask? Well my darling, I’m happy to oblige you… Feminine Confidence is what you show to the world through your actions when you no longer feel like you are not enough. It’s you being more of yourself. The real you. The authentic you, beneath the layers of walls you’ve built up to protect yourself from pain. Yes, that pain, the one we all try so desperately to get away from by burying it deep in the recesses of our existence, why by the way never works so I don’t even know why we still bother. Most of us don’t even know who that person is. I mean we may have a vague picture in our minds of what and who that is but in practical terms it’s almost inconceivable. Dealing with your pain is never going to be easy, whoever is telling you that does not love you. Truth is it’s not going to be easy, but if you’re trying to grow it’s something you’re just going to have to buck up and do, there’s no two ways about it. Growth will only take place in discomfort. But back to Feminine Confidence, think about it as you sprinkling & oozing out the glorious natural essence of your being effortlessly, wherever you go.
Now that we’ve gotten the what, we can jump on the how.
“VISUALIZE YOUR HIGHEST SELF AND START SHOWING UP AS HER.”
We all tell ourselves that when X happens we’re going to start doing Y, Z… Come on, don’t lie, I know you do it too, it’s okay I won’t even judge lol. Well on that issue, I’m here to let you know that you need to drop that mindset immediately, it’s holding you back from seeing the world in reality from a perspective you have only ever imagined. Stop it right now, and replace it with actually doing that thing. It doesn’t even have to be anything big. Whatever you’ve been meaning to do and haven’t yet cuz you’re waiting for X, Y, Z to fall into place, just do it. Cuz let me tell you something if that’s something you’re serious about wanting to do and are not cultivating the habit of doing now, when you get to where you want to be you’re going to be same you postponing that thing till another time. Insanity is said to be doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, and as much as I bloom just thinking about the beauty of insanity I’m here to burst both your bubble and mine. There’s a time and place for everything. This is not where you apply insanity, it’s where you apply being intentional. Of you can’t be who you are now, you’ll never be comfortable being you later.
I know I said I wasn’t going to point out more reasons why and that’s all I was going to say cuz I mean, they’re kind of obvious. Well, I changed my mind. I don’t know about you, but from my perspective, being masculine as a female just doesn’t work, it doesn’t serve you and we know that whatever doesn’t serve is has to go. Her Royal Highness says no. Yes I mean you (and me of course). But on a less serious note than my narcissism, being a guy is not appealing to me at all. Why suffer when you can be female and chop life? It’s a no brainer. There’s also the part where being feminine and having feminine confidence is a mindset and let’s be honest you know intellectual stimulation gets ALL your engines revving *wink wink*. I could go on but I was already sold on the best life part, I think that in itself should be enough reason as to why this is important.
Ultimately, we should note that happiness comes from a healthy balance of both masculine and feminine energy, so I’m not dissing that energy, we love all energy here haha. I’m just trying to let you know that you do not have to accept the status quo and you do not have to live your life as a bitter and resentful woman unable to get past her pain. There are alternatives, you just need to commit to doing the work and commit to growing in your femininity, invest in your feminine education and spend time engaging in quintessentially feminine activities it will open doors and you won’t be burned out so you’ll get to enjoy those open doors to the max! NEVER let anyone ever shame you for being who you were created to be.
I think it’s time to own our power, don’t you think so too? Let me know in the comments section below.
Yours truly, Chalya.